Foreign Language Swearing

I don’t know about you, but I find English swear words to be rather… uninspired. Most of the really bad things you can say in this language are variations on the same few words, if you ask me. (And English isn’t the only language with uninspired swearing. Spanish always seemed to be rather uninspired, too, though I may be inaccurate in this assumption, as my Spanish is really not so good.)

Russian, however, is a different story. Russian swearing is satisfying in a way that English swearing is not. I’ve been in such a good mood today because I was able to swear in Russian at an annoying person on the phone.

Basically, this is what happened: a couple of weeks ago, some drug addict prostitute (fine, I don’t have any proof that she’s a prostitute, but it’s basically the only thing she could be that would explain why she is often up at three and four in the morning) texted my mom on her phone. My mom politely explained that she does not know this individual, but this individual has persisted in texting and even started calling my mom on her phone.

I took matters into my own hands today. I answered this idiot’s phone calls and proceeded to scream in Russian and say things that I would never, ever say in front of my dear Russian professor or any of my Russian-speaking friends. It was a thrilling experience.

So when someone asks me again why I chose to study Russian, I can say, with all seriousness, that I learned this fabulous language to curse out drug addicts over the phone.

(Of course, I hope it goes without saying that such situations as the one I’ve described are the exception. I promise I don’t speak like this in front of polite company, in English or Russian!)

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4 thoughts on “Foreign Language Swearing

  1. I agree that Russian has some hairy swears. When I lived in Ukraine, I heard at the train station some guy yell something at another guy. I asked my friend what [begins with “x”] means. This big kick-boxer friend took me around the corner where no one could hear us. He whispered, “It means the male member.” No word in English carries that much shame!

    I disagree with you about Spanish, though. I had a friend in Spain who would go all Ricky-Ricardo when he would stub his toe. I asked what all he could say–it would take 30 seconds of non-stop utterances. He said, “First you curse God. Then you curse the Virgin. etc.” Those curses got very picturesque!

    1. Fair enough, I probably didn’t know enough Spanish to properly learn swearing and fully appreciate it at the time 🙂

      I just looked at the about page on your blog and I see you speak Ukrainian. Is Ukrainian swearing like Russian swearing (in the sense of being extremely satisfying and creative the way Russian is)? I myself don’t know Ukrainian so well. I can understand a lot of it, but not really speak it.

  2. “I answered this idiot’s phone calls and proceeded to scream in Russian and say things that I would never, ever say in front of my dear Russian professor or any of my Russian-speaking friends.”

    экземпляры в студию?

  3. swearing in polish could be at least as inspirational as in russian or ukrainian, and…

    (…) “It means the male member.”(…)

    i don’t know ukrainian, but i guess that this word shoul sound like “Ty c…..”,

    ok nevermind 😉

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